Darulmaarif.net – Indramayu, May 20, 2025 | 09.00 WIB
Islamic boarding school, as a traditional Islamic educational institution, has become the main choice of many parents in educating their children to become a righteous and knowledgeable person. However, not a few santri guardians who hold concerns about their children’s association in the cottage environment. This concern departs from various phenomena such as cases of bullying, juvenile delinquency, or negative influences from fellow students. This article aims to review the problems that are the problems of the dilemma of the guardians of the santri towards their children in the pesantren.
Reality of Concerns of Santri Guardians
Concern for association is a form Girahah (jealousy and responsibility) Parents from the honor and future of the child. In many cases, the saints felt control over supervision when the child lived in a dormitory school. This is a reasonable thing, because in the soul of parents there is a great divine belief: maintaining and guiding their children as in QS At-Tahrim verse 6:
Hey, who is the same person
Meaning: “O you who believe, keep yourself and your family from the fire of hell …” (QS. At-Tahrim Verse 6)
Imam Al-Qurthubi in his interpretation of Al Jami ‘Li Ahkam Al-Qur’an said, in this word Allah is a problem, which is a command for humans to protect themselves and their families from hell. Adh-Dhahhak said, “The meaning of God’s Word is: Protect (you) yourself. As for your family, let them protect themselves from hell.” Ali bin Abi Thalhah tells from Ibn Abbas: “Protect yourself, and order your family to meditate and pray, Allah preserves it for you (from the fire of hell).” Thus, a person must improve himself with compliance, and even improve his family deserves to be a leader to improve the person they lead.
Association in Islamic View
In Islam, associations greatly affect a person’s morals and morals. Rasulullah (may peace on it) said:
In the authority of Abu Hurairah, may Allah be happy with Him, that the Prophet, may God’s prayer and peace be above him, said: “The man is on his cell debt, so that one of you is seen.
Meaning: “Abu Hurairah Rodliyallohu ‘anhu- narrated that the Prophet said,” someone depends on the religion of his close friend. Therefore, you should pay attention to who is used as a close friend. ” (HR. Imam At-Tirmidzi)
Imam al-Ghazali Di Ihya ‘Ulum al-Din (Juz 3) emphasizes the importance of choosing friends, because friends can be a helper towards virtue or vice versa, the path to destruction.
So, it is natural that the santri guardian wants a pesantren environment that not only teaches knowledge, but also forms character with intensive supervision and guidance.
Expert view
In the Al-Hikam The work of Ibn Athaillah is mentioned that choosing friends must be selective, who can get closer to Allah.
Don’t accompany someone who does not cancel you, also does not show the proverb
Meaning: “Don’t make friends (hang out) with people whose behavior does not awaken you (to achieve the pleasure of Allah) and his words do not show you to Allah.”
This book confirms that the learning environment must not be ignored, because forming a person is as important as filling in reason.
So are Manzhumah Hidayatil Adzkiya Ila Thariqil AwliyaImam Zaynuddin al-Malibari said that one way to treat the heart is to sit with the pious people. As the following statement:
And the five heart medicine is a reading by managing the meaning, stomach of the cell, night and the pleasure of magic, and the righteous sitting.
Meaning: “There are five medicine: read the Qur’an by reflecting on its meaning, with an empty stomach, night prayer, prayer at dawn, and the main Saleh assembly,” (Sheikh Zainuddin bin Ali Al-Malibari, Manzhumah Hidayatil Adzkiya ila Thariqil Awliya, [Indonesia, Al-Haramain Jaya: 2001 M]Page 49).
Pesantren should ideally be a place that should represent this ecosystem.
Islamic solution to this concern
- Tabayyun and Husnudzon
Islam teaches to avoid prejudice and prioritize tabayyun (Surah Al-Hujurat: 6). Do not be in a hurry to judge a bad boarding school just because of issues that are not necessarily true.
- Choose an open and transparent boarding school
Two -way communication between the guardians and the pesantren is important so that the guardian feels involved in the development of his child.
- Strengthen prayer and resignation
Parents’ prayers are very mustajab. In the hadith mentioned:
Three calls that were answered by them, there was no doubt about the call of anger, a traveler call, and father’s call to his son
Meaning: “Three Mustajab prayers that are undoubtedly are prayers of people who are tyrannical, prayers of people who are traveling (safar) and good prayers of parents to their children.” (HR. Imam Ibnu Majah)
- Educated children with values before science
In the From Al-MutaallimIt is stated that Manners is the foundation of science. Parents need to instill this principle before the child is boarding.
Talking about manners is far more noble than science in the book of Ta’lim Muta’allim is also explained:
When I see many science students in our day, they find knowledge and do not achieve and from their benefits and fruits – which are work and publishing – they are prohibited when they make mistakes and leave their strips, and all those who make mistakes on the road have been lost, and what is intended is not intended to say or most
Meaning: “When I see a lot of the prosecutors of knowledge in our time we are serious in studying, but cannot achieve the results. Among the benefits and fruit of science is to practice knowledge and spread it. They are hindered (from knowledge) because of the mistakes in the method of seeking knowledge, and they leave the conditions. While every person who goes wrong will be lost, and not get anything he wants a little or a lot. wisdom “. (Imam Al-Zarnûji, Ta’lîm al-Muta’allim Tharîq at-ta’allum, page 57)
- Involve yourself in pesantren activities
Participating in friendship activities, the Wali Santri Forum, and mutual cooperation can build a sense of security and strengthen relationships.
The concern of the santri guardian of his son’s association in pesantren is a form of love and responsibility. However, Islam has provided a comprehensive solution: ranging from choosing a good environment, building communication, to strengthening spirituality. Pesantren, as a moral and science fortress, need to improve to become the best environment for the future Islamic generation. So, let us respond to this problem wisely, fairly, and full of faith.
Hope it is useful. Wallohu a’lam.
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